Tuesday, March 12, 2024

Project 365, Week 10

It was such a difficult week and also there were some stunningly beautiful moments. What a grace that joy and sorrow are woven together.

March 4
The morning sun was pretty as we headed toward the city for my procedure. I've often said about chemo that the only thing worse than getting it is not getting it; showing up for it but then being turned away because blood counts are too low, for instance. 

This day the only thing worse than having a risky procedure was being turned away because scar tissue from my surgery nine years ago had created a granite wall that, despite a few attempts, they were unable to penetrate. We left feeling truly at a loss.


March 5
Being stronger than my desire to spend the day in bed in self-pity and still having to wait 24-hours to shower, I brushed my hair and put on some business clothes over bandages and leftover brown antiseptic from the procedure and put one foot in front of the other.


March 6
Foggy morning walk, intentionally looking for beauty and reminding myself of things I  know to be true.


March 7
A boy and his dog.


March 8
The kids did Fine Arts and then Youth Convention, which was very conveniently located in Hartford this year. Maddy was a judge for dance so Avery got to be on Ezra duty for a couple hours, and it delighted her greatly to be wearing a baby.


March 9
The kids got home from Youth Convention as we got home from the office and then we were off to Aiden's soccer game. What a privilege to be able to take him and watch.


March 10
For many reasons it was a special day. My heart was so full to be sitting in church with my family.


 

Tuesday, March 5, 2024

Project 365, Week 9

A little bit of this and a whole lot of that this week. Life is kind of weird right now with tax season droning on, sprinkled with raising kids and doing ridiculous cancer stuff. Its hard and its holy. Its mundane and its extraordinary.

February 26
Sometimes you gotta find some sun and take in the therapy it provides.


February 27
It was such a foggy morning as my dad drove me down for pre-op labs.



What should have been a 5 minute thing turn into 30. The nurse questioned the pregnancy test ordered. I told her that treatments and surgeries done (at MSK) have made it impossible and so a couple years ago I had an official exemption put on my record, but still it comes up regularly. She said, hmm...let me pull up your "problems" tab. I laughed out loud. "There's a problems tab?? You will break the computer if you click on mine!" 

We finally got that situated so my insurance company wasn't billed for an unnecessary test (they must hate me enough already).  Eventually my dad and I were back on the road, the fog was lifted and it was a smooth ride, with a coffee stop, of course.


Family fondue with my best crew.


Ginger's favorite spot is the couch in our bonus room but when we have that door closed because we don't heat it, she uses Aiden's room as second best. They are both happy with the arrangement.


February 28
Amanda and I took a mid-day break when she got home from school and had a lovely conversation while a light rain turned heavy.


February 29
It was a glorious morning for walking. It was also Leap Day, so I felt a little bad that it was such a regular day.


March 1
I forgot to get a picture with Shelva, who I met for breakfast while she was in CT for the week. It happened to be her wedding anniversary and it was crazy to think we were standing together 21 years ago.


We enjoyed an employee appreciation lunch. I look at this picture now a couple weeks later and think, wow...we did not know how much it would change! This team is THE best and we all work really well together.


March 2
TBQ celebrated four years....because God. Its been incredible to be a part of! It ended up being a busy night for most but we were able to have a couple alumni present.






March 3
My faith helps me know what to do with my feelings. I was rolling that around as I struggled to prepare for my procedure in NYC the next day. 

Also, it was the first day to sit out on the porch!!


 

Thursday, February 29, 2024

Project 365, Week 8

Lots of tax office stuff happening...its just that time of year. Blessed ordinary days not to be taken for granted.

February 19
Amanda spent some of her day off of school working on some projects at the office and it was nice to have her kicking around. I love that she cares about the details.


Always good to have teens kicking around, too. :)


February 20
The sunshine was spectacular.


February 21
My bi-annual trip to the salon. 


February 22
Since I was out at the right time, I started Amanda's car for her drive to school. Her "so her" Christmas present made me smile, especially against the frosty backdrop.


February 23
Nathanael and I left the office heading to TBQ at just the right time to watch this stunning scene unfold for 10 minutes. It felt like a personal gift.


TBQ is full of nieces and nephews, which makes it that much more special.


February 24
Its that time of year when signs of spring begin to pop up all over.


Shaun and I went to watch Aiden play and we noted the impossibility that he is here, playing with man-sized people. He's still working hard to get his feet back under him after the injury. I admire his determination and hard work.


 

Wednesday, February 28, 2024

Project 365, Week 7

It was a classic wintery week with a little celebration and a little hibernation.

February 12
Fun treats. :)


February 13
A snow day, with a foot of snow and so, so pretty!


I know it was a foot, because Avery went out with a ruler to measure. Its a mystery how genetics work, but I see so much of my dad in her.



Sweet boy made sure I had a path to the hot tub.



February 14
A few weeks back we took some photos for our annual Valentine's card. It was a challenge to get everyone together so finally I offered the kids a pass, thinking now that they are so old, we could end the tradition. They wouldn't hear of it, believing our family would be anticipating their card. It was very sweet. 

I love this crew and all their big-ness.





In addition to Valentines's Day, it was also the first day of Lent. Lent is a time to mourn so we can find deeper joy. A time for us to see our need for Jesus, to cling to the hope of the gospel. Its not my favorite thing to take a deep, honest look at my sin, to confront the depravity of my heart but it allows me to see the cross more clearly and to stand amazed at the work that was done.


AND Valentine's Day ! Avery and I were festive at the office. :)


The kids all went to Mid Week for the evening so Shaun offered to take me out after work but I was so tired and hurting. So he picked up take out and we ate out of brown paper bags at the kitchen counter and then watched a movie and it was just right.


February 15
My sticky note about putting gym equipment back when you're done has gone unheeded.


February 16
I was enjoying the bouquet of flowers Jack gave Avery.


We're in a different practice space for TBQ and its our best spot yet.


February 17
We had a TBQ meet on our home turf, so we had lots of familiar people helping.











It was funny to look out the window and see bathing suits and snow pants, side-by-side. 



Shaun sent me a picture of Aiden taking the field for the first time since early October. Aiden was very excited to be back (so were we!)


February 18
It was a special day for Maddy and Mason as they dedicated Ezra and Mason preached.



What a difference community makes! Even without getting too deep into the family tree, Ezra has dozens of family members who would happily and willingly take her and give her a loving, safe home if needed.  Additionally there are many church families who would do the same. 

Kids go into foster care when the parent runs into trouble and the state asks, do you have a family member, a neighbor who can care for your child for some time and the answer is no. The lack is something to be mindful of, and when you have abundance, its something to be thankful for.