Numbering Days, Week 46-48

Sloan has asked to do genetic testing on some samples they took during my back surgery in December. There was a whole presentation to go through and then verbal and written consent. I can't imagine saying no to such a simple (on my part) way of advancing research.

On Monday my dad took me to do labs and MRI. Its hard on him to have all this happening to me, but he jumps in anyway to do what he can.

Waiting in the changing room. Sometimes when I wear no metal they don't ask me to change, sometimes they still want me to. Sometimes I question authority if I deem there to be a good reason to, but more often I just go along with it.

The lab work came back through my portal that afternoon. The marker they keep an eye on was quite elevated. I took the news hard. I was sure that it would mean going back on treatment. It was a tough couple days just working through my feelings and trying to get up the courage to do something I really didn't want to do.

On Thursday, we went to Manhattan to do in-person appointments. As we were waiting (and waiting, and waiting), I looked over at my boys with such gratitude. My dad, my husband, my son all sitting in cancer center waiting rooms with me this week. And if not them, I have a brother and brothers-in-law and an uncle who would willingly be there at a moments notice. In a world where men often leave when it gets hard, I'm thankful to be surrounded by more than a few good men.

I had x-rays and met with my oncologist and spine doctor. Three appointments, five hours. Both doctors looked at the PET, MRI and x-rays that I've had in the last month and there are no significant changes. Such great news! There is no answer to the elevated blood work and much of the pain is attributed to fallout from radiation a year ago and pinched nerves from the back surgery but there was no evidence that we need to start treatment back up.

Though we all still have many questions, for this day I was satisfied with the wait and watch answer. In truth, I was absolutely giddy about escaping without treatment! I stepped out onto the sidewalk, feeling smug about blending in with the masses of people doing regular life stuff, not sick person stuff. I walked through Central Park, happy to be alive, noticing colors and smells and beauty, music. This life...

Its been beautiful and terrible, more painful, more wonderful than I ever could have known

 

Project 365, Week 25

Full week with lots of family time and celebrations. My heart is full!

June 17

There have only been a few times the five of us have vacationed together, we usually go with extended family, or at least a foster kid or three. We've discovered that we don't all share the same dream vacation, so in an attempt to bridge the gap (and most importantly, show them more of the U.S.), I chose Tennessee. Nashville for the city/country music enthusiasts, and the Smokey Mountains for the others.

We got to the airport early on Saturday morning, a new-to-us tiny airport with very cheap and direct flights. It was just a little early for my teens. ;)

The flight was under two hours so after breakfast, we got to work seeing the sights.

Amanda got authentic cowboy boots and they couldn't be more "her". She was over the moon!

We checked in to our hotel and then walked to downtown Nashville. It was very crowded and some of us were on sensory overload but Shaun spotted this restaurant/bar with no line. We lingered over dinner and the quality live music. It was so fun!

June 18

After enjoying a leisurely hotel breakfast together, Shaun and I went to church while the kids were still sleeping. Since it was Father's Day, they recognized various groups of men, like grandfathers with more than a certain number of grandkids, first-time dad and adoptive and foster dads. So sweet...they gave out gift cards to the dads standing. My mind flashed to scenes and moments of time over the last 12 years we've been foster parents of Shaun giving and caring and doing and being. Truly only God knows the ways he has sacrificed for and loved the kids who have come through our home. 

The church is doing a Story Tellers series right now and the interview they showed during service was amazing! Definitely worth your 30 minutes (link here)!

Shaun and a couple kids swam and then we set out to walk more of Nashville. We visited a true-to-size replica of The Parthenon, Music Row and then we watched the half dozen-ish sporting events that Shaun cared about. 

We've been raising kids for nearly two decades together. Shaun's faith and family are his everything, evidenced in all he does (and doesn't do). He has created a legacy of integrity and a love that keeps pursuing. He saves his best for us and we're so thankful for him!

June 19

After breakfast, we took the 4-hour drive east to the Smokey Mountains where we finished out our time away.

Our cabin was nestled in a quiet community with gorgeous view, yet in five minutes we could be at the national park or downtown Pigeon Forge with a sizable strip of food and entertainment. In choosing a cabin, I carefully avoided the ones that boasted they were "secluded". We are not a "secluded cabin" kind of family. ;)

 

June 20

We kept waiting for the rain to clear, but it stayed anywhere from showery to downpour most of the day and really for the rest of our stay in Tennessee. Disappointing, for sure, but also our gang can "chill" pretty well.

Surprisingly, at least to me, the Smokey Mountain National Park is the most visited among the parks, with 14 million visitors annually. This day we "hiked" to Laurel Falls. It's very popular because much of it is paved so I wasn't worried about being able to maneuver it. It was just 2.5 miles round trip, which started out dry and ended up quite rainy. There were mixed reviews of the experience. :)

June 22

Another rainy day, but around dinnertime it cleared enough to go mini-golfing and out to dinner at one of our favorites.

June 23

We packed up and drove two hours to the airport. It was an easy flight and we were home by 2 PM.

It was so good to be home and I thought, how blessed am I that my favorite spot is my back porch. 

Aiden had his first captain's practice for the high school soccer team. So gutsy to show up as a freshman! I really wanted to stay and watch but Shaun made me promise to give Aiden his space. So instead, I walked around track at the game field and prayed for him and the girls.

The girls were at a Triple A baseball game with friends and Avery sent me the beautiful sunset they got to experience.

June 23

Avery gets to finish out the summer as a "kid" in youth group.

June 24

Started this day taking Amanda to the mandatory 8-hour drug & alcohol class, of which the parent needs to be present for two of the hours. It was the sketchiest place, but it checked the box for her so she can go for her license test. I waited across the street for the parent part.

Back at the house, birthday celebrations were underway for Avery, who turned 18!!! Jack and Sarah came over to play games, do lunch and witness her getting an ear pierced. That Avery wanted me along was the sweetest!!

This girl who made us parents and immediately convinced us it was the best thing ever, has been a happy, smiley girl from the start. She lives life full of enthusiasm, she's dependable and trustworthy and has made growing up look easy. She loves babies and her family and she's good company. We're so very grateful for these 18 years we've had with her!

June 25

I love quiet Sundays.

And it was a big day for Aiden with his first high school summer league. The varsity team has an established goalie, so he played the field for this game.