Project 365, Week 5

We closed out January and welcomed February. The groundhog indicated that spring would come early, so we will eagerly look for signs of nature springing up.

January 29

On Monday mornings the kids are all gone by 7:45 AM. Ginger and I came back from our walk to find a party happening in the driveway.

Shaun and I attended CPR training, a DCF requirement for relicensing.

January 30

No picture.

January 31

It was the last day to return some items from Christmas, so Amanda and I went to drop off during her study hall. The dam was too pretty to not stop and there was even a guy fishing.

February 1

Jack has a great job now and with benefits so we were chatting with them about all things financial.

February 2

My mom came up from Florida for several day. She was staying with Amy but Avery and I snuck out of work for an hour to see her and it just happened to coincide with when Little Ezra was there. Oh my word...she's smiling now and is just about the cutest thing ever. Maddy mothers so naturally and gracefully, while also being honest about the challenges that come that whole scene.

Apparently there was a big movie viewing at my house after youth group but I was sound asleep while Shaun was parent on duty.

February 3

Over $1k of loose coin has been counted and put into wrappers. Until next time...

February 4

Look! A flower, and its hardly even February! 😉

The family got together before my mom headed out the next day. Amy put much of it together and brought it over....we ate soup and bread and sundaes and it was delicious and so great to have everyone together. There were a couple tweens, nine teens, a couple young-marrieds, three great-grandparents and (no one would argue) best of all...a toddler, a newborn and a puppy...it was actually a slice of heaven. So much love, so much fun, so very blessed.

Project 365, Week 4

Sometimes January feels long, but this one has felt manageable, nice even. We're enjoying this last bit of time before much of our time is spoken for with tax season.

January 22

The quiet, the fresh air, the ability to walk, the conversations with God, the sun rising...my morning walks are beautiful, sacred, life-giving.

January 23

Amanda helped me run some errands. Ginger got some needed shots (don't hate me because we vax our dog 😉) and we visited our apartment building, among other things.

January 24

We'd been trying to get our whole office staff together to do a new group picture and this was the day, even in the light snow. What a team! Shaun and I are so grateful for each one...they are fun, hardworking, dedicated and make decisions with integrity.

Professional office manager by morning, veteran cancer patient by afternoon. My dad drove me and after the scan, even though it was 3pm, he made sure to get me coffee right away, since I wasn't able to eat or drink beforehand. It was a no-issues drive.

January 25

It seems banks are getting rid of their coin counters but with Avery's waitressing job and our apartment building's coin-operated washer/dryer we regularly have lots of coin. The bank referred us to the grocery store, which I found out charges 12%. So, we got wrappers and started wrapping. Turns out its quite addicting and the 12 years I worked in banking has come in very handy....my family is super impressed with my coin-rolling skills.

January 26

TBQ practice on Friday nights is a highlight of my week! Pastor Luke was our guest speaker this night. Right now we're in the book of James, being challenged with things such as jealousy, pride, selfishness, an untamed tongue.

January 27

Game night!

January 28

Even though we arrived in two cars, we all ended up on the same shuttle. I miss the days when the kids were gleeful about the quarter mile shuttle ride from the commuter lot to church.

 

Numbering Days, Week 77-78

We're one month into a fresh, new year. I used to take goal-setting very seriously, confident they could be accomplished with enough will power and self-discipline. New year, new me was a real thing to me. Until it was not.

I remember when I was first sick and we rang in a new year. I couldn't set any goals because I was working on getting through the day in front of me. The ball drop in Times Square changed nothing for me and no amount of habit tracking was going to suddenly make everything ok. 

There is value in setting goals, creating new habits. I truly believe it. But I just want to acknowledge those of you who are living in this new year as the same you. The same you still experiencing the same sickness, or addiction, or marriage problems or problem child. The same you dealing with the same sin, the same loneliness, the same wondering how this could be your life. I get it.

I can tell you that even with the same set of circumstances and the same you, this new year can be new. In ongoing suffering, with an uncertain future...right in the middle, as I lean it, my heart understands God's love for me more fully. My trust in Him grows stronger. He is making me new in the ways that matter. 

I joke that they are doing a side experiment on me to find out how much radiation is too much. Sooo many MRIs, CT scans, PET scans... if I had to guess, I'd say I'm likely around 100, give or take. In general they don't bother me...I'm not claustrophobic and I often just end up falling asleep. The PET scan however always gives me pause....the radioactive substance that goes directly into my veins, the warning to stay away from pregnant women and young children for 24 hours after, the separate restroom (no lines, no waiting!)...its just a little freaky.

This week we had a telemedecine appointment with the Interventional Radiologist doctor. Several times he began a statement with "As you know, your case is very unique...". So I've heard. It is a strange feeling to be the patient they are experimenting with; "off-script", as they say. 

He reviewed the scans and had good news to share with us!! The PET scan from January 24 has demonstrated good response to the ablation with no residual hypermetabolic lesion in the ablated area.

Meaning, the procedure we did earlier in the month was effective! Such good news...a miracle!

We talked through plans for the other procedure, which has unique (there's that word again!) challenges because of the hardware in my back. He's encouraged by the past outcome while being realistic about what we face next. 

Because the second procedure is happening in early March, there was some gray area about whether to squeeze in two chemo treatments, beginning with the one already scheduled for January 31. Since both the IR doctor and my oncologist were waffling back and forth, I helped make the gray area black and white and said, no thank you to chemo treatments in February. I don't get any days off from cancer but several weeks free of needles and nonsense sounds wonderful. In the meantime, I'll be flipping "perfect" pancakes that wow my family. 🤣