Project 365, Week 20

Life is hard and also, there are so many miracles sprinkled throughout everyday life, just for the finding. I love to ponder and notice how bitter and sweet, brutal and beautiful are most always woven together. Life is good and We can do hard things are two of my very favorite sayings and they are rarely independent of each other. It is just the way of things.

With my camera I love to capture the life-is-good parts....its one of the ways that I express gratitude. But that doesn't mean that the pretty, easy parts are good and the hard, uncomfortable parts are bad. I have found (and I reminding myself again) that some of the most beautiful and holy moments are in the suffering and pain (which can usually only see when you look back). And a really good time to be wowed by a sunrise and other daily miracles is in the middle of a pandemic. Or sickness, or relationship trouble, or financial hardship.

May 11

May in Connecticut is absolutely enchanting. The green is so fresh, the flowering trees are in full bloom. The memory of short days is still fresh and as such, the early-rising and late-setting sun is still a novelty not taken for granted. I'm often stopped in my tracks by the beauty and majesty of it all.

May 12
He's up and at school early. Less because he's a diligent student and more because he wants to get it out of the way. Though his teacher offers an optional video meeting twice a day, he usually opts to just work on his own.

May 13
A stunning start to the day.

Post-family fun run in the Chick-Fil-A parking lot. We've gotten pretty good with the order ahead app and curbside pickup. However, this time my sandwich didn't make it in the bag, something we discovered too far down the road. I sent them an email and they credited me, but it made me realize that I haven't given them any positive feedback, even though a visit to them has become a highlight of our weekly lives. Thank you, Chick-Fil-A for the important role you play in our family. :)

I love watching/listening to my kids Facetime with little cousins.

May 14
Start a fire in the afternoon, wearing pajamas? I mean, why not?

I discovered a robin's nest, right next to our front walkway, at waist height.

May 15
Since we were going through our old town to get the pickup truck, we stopped for a little treat, for old times sake.

We also took a little detour to go by one of my favorite spots during this time of year. I love that quarantine affords us the time to stop and smell the roses.

Several days this week the conditions were prime for a rainbow and finally, we spotted one!

May 16
Bright and early Avery and I hit the Farmer's Market. She's a good company girl.

Then we spent quite a few hours filling containers and making our yard look pretty. Its happy work that pays off over and over all summer long.

We were particularly amazed by these.

How do I know God loves me? Because everything is more beautiful than it needs to be.

May 17
All three babies hatched!! We're trying to leave Mama Robin alone so she can do her thing but we are so enthralled by this up-close viewing of nature in action.

A good sign! The game we spend hours and hours a week playing has been moved out to the porch!! :)

My neighbor sent this photo. Lots of boys!

While the other three went golfing, Amanda and I took a road trip to get ice cream for some much needed connection time. Life is hard, particularly when you are 13.

Shaun's patience and steadiness are astounding, even in times of adversity and suffering...like teaching a resistant, math-challenged middle schooler. ;) Oy!

May's 10 on 10

10 pictures on the 10th day of the month (Sunday...Mother's Day). {Document a snapshot 

of your life; find beauty among the ordinary things in your day!}

Pretty, pretty sun that comes through the front windows when the house is quiet and the day holds so much promise.

Aiden asked if I wanted to read with him. When I joined him on the couch, he said he'd "fluffed" the blanket for me. Ha!

Avery usually beats me at Boggle, but I keep trying.

Kim came over and it'd been a while since we'd seen each other so I got caught up on her life (the parts she's willing to share at least) and we spent several hours together, walking, chatting, playing games.

Long after everyone one else got out to prepare dinner, Aiden and I stayed until we were good and prune-y. For whatever reason the hot tub makes him very chatty and I get peeks into his heart.

The girls worked hard on dinner...and cleaned up after.

We even ate in the dining room on china and with candles. It was very special.

We ended the day watching Little Women as a family. And this is how I know Aiden and Shaun truly love me. :) It was a good day.

In motherhood, I spend lots of time battling fear, certain I'm getting most of it wrong, desperately wanting to control people and outcomes but knowing I can't (and shouldn't). I listened to my kids express their love and appreciation and chose to believe the words they were saying and thanked God for his grace that covers my gaps. Truly.

Project 365, Week 19

Traditionally, May is one of my favorite months, so I'm happy to be here! There was lots more of all of the same in this 7th week of quarantine...campfires, games, puzzles, yard work, school work, family exercise, Zoom calls. There is so much good and so many opportunities to shape hearts, both parent and child. Love this quote I read this week: Joy isn't a privilege, its my responsibility. Maybe that is never truer than when times are especially tough.

May 4

On my way to the store, I had to pull over and admire this beauty...what an amazing time of year in these parts!!

Games. :)

May 5
Cinco de Mayo landed on Taco Tuesday, making it a perfect excuse for a party. For my Mexican-food loving daughter, we celebrated! :)

May 6
Week #6 at the track. Aiden won, Shaun and Amanda got their best times, and Chick-fil-A did not disappoint.

May 7
We have a cardinal family in the backyard. They seem to do a really nice job sharing childcare and household responsibilities.

A coming-of-age moment....after careful instruction, Aiden got to mow the lawn on the tractor, no doubt his first of many in his lifetime.

May 8
The night before we'd been talking about Amanda and water hoses. Though I have a stockpile of such photos over the years, this one remains my favorite. She and Riley just could not have been loving life anymore than they were in this moment.

I absolutely think there are sections of heaven that look like this.

May 9
Amanda got on a Zoom call hosted by a friend who was leading a stretching time. Amanda didn't realize it would be with all her flexible dance friends, but she muscled through and was a good sport about it. We got a good laugh.

Aiden still loves to spend time alone, just him and his legos (and no sisters!).

Weightlifting day for the crew.

May 10
Honestly? Motherhood was something I never dreamed of, wished for or particularly wanted. And then I met baby Avery and immediately I was in love with her and being a mom. So much so that I've mothered more than 30 kids who have come through our doors. Its almost never comfortable or easy and I feel so unqualified to deal with the big life and heart issues that we face on a daily basis but I also am certain this is something that God placed on our hearts to do. I can't speak for all the mom-with-their-kids pictures that got posted over the weekend, but this one is an imperfect, God-breathed, hard-fought-for mom & kids group. I am humbled, I am thankful, I am blessed.

Project 365, Week 18

I adore this slow cadence of life right now....my heart and soul need so much quiet, stillness, pause. Especially when I feel out of my league to live my life (which is usually), I need time to fix my mind, to re-organize my thoughts. Left to my own I fear failure or not measuring up, I feel left alone, I get overwhelmed by the needs around me, I have anxious thoughts that I can't even name. I spend large amounts of my time reminding myself of truth and directing my thoughts towards things that are true and right and lovely and good.

April 27

A boy, his book and his dog. Some days he stays in his bathrobe all day.

April 28
Aiden has been learning how to build a good fire. I've often wondered if he'll go into civil engineering...he seems to have an above average fascination with fire and water flow.

April 29

Aiden and Shaun set out early for nine holes. Aiden shot his best game ever....such a treat to live minutes form a golf course.

Family Fun Run...Aiden was the winner and everyone but me improved their time.

April 30
"Mom, is it ok if I do a little more reading on the Cuban Missile Crisis before I start school?" (For the record, I had to look up how to even spell "missile" :)

The boys took Axis & Allies back out...since it wasn't Shaun's birthday, all the girls declined. :)

May 1
This was the scene when I got home from work...Shaun and the kids were well into a game of Cash Flow (highly recommend for teaching kids, or adults for that matter, about money). I don't love that I'm still working so much, I really prefer to be home when the kids are, but I'm thankful the office is just two minutes from home, I enjoy the work, and the workday is relatively short.

May 2
They've been consistent in their weekend weight-lifting workout. Aiden and Avery especially are enjoying the challenge of watching the weight and number of reps increase.

We miss the library being open and our mail lady probably does too but we're helping Amazon to stay in business. We need books in our lives!!

Yay for campfires and hard and holy moments with friends.

May 3
A Sunday with perfect weather...what a life-infusing day!

Shaun and the kids did yoga...it did not sound relaxing and meditative from the other room. ;)

Our neighbor turned 43 and his wife organized a birthday parade. Our town's volunteer fire department came with about a dozen vehicles, followed by friends of maybe 30 cars, who had all been instructed to come armed with water balloons. It was so great to see people, especially the one who is finally recovered from COVID and was out and about.

This week our pastor encouraged us to not "turtle up", which is for sure my default. But then, on a beautiful day after many of rain, I sit on my neighbor's front lawn and have a one-on-one talk and, with tears she shares a deep pain, and I am reminded how much I love people and how much we need each other.

Birthday Parade #2, Aiden and I did a drive-by for a friend/classmate.

It was the kind of day you just had to be outside for...as we sat on the patio, I noted that on a normal Sunday in May we would have been "off to the races", with church and sports, in all different directions. Instead, we were leisurely taking in the day, getting time together to do nothing...like target practice with the BB gun and taking walks. While its here, Shaun and I are choosing to see this time in life as a gift.