Friday, February 3, 2017

State of the House ~ January

This is the easiest January I've had in a couple years, meaning I'm not going through chemotherapy and I'm not packing around a wound-vacuum as I have for the last two. Given that, you'd think I would spend every day on a cloud, happy as a lark. But I've learned something that I didn't used to know. Life is hard... and people suffer more frequently and deeply than they admit.

"Sounds like a whole week of triumphs". That was the comment left on one of my weekly posts by a sweet reader. When I read it I thought, wow...that is not at all what the week was. Instead, the week was a strained marriage relationship, speaking only when necessary. It was taking a hard look at foster care, questioning if its the right thing for our family. It was feeling like I was in over my head at work and not crossing things off the to-do list at home. Triumphs? Yes, we had some but that is not the whole story. It rarely is.

I don't want this blog to be a place where I display all the ways I have it together. I also don't think its appropriate for it to be a place where I detail my husband's shortcomings or the ways my kid's sinful natures are exposed in everyday life. I desire to be authentic and not add to the already saturated market of put-together, photo-shopped lives.

"Normal", whatever that is, is not how we can be described. We know this, are aware of it. And usually its okay. Somedays I look around and think, wow...we really are crazy. The other day I left work and went directly to school for pick-up.  When we got home, my nurse was waiting for us. While I was sitting at the kitchen table having my monthly medi-port flush, H and his friend from arrived home from high school. Then my SIL came in to drop off my nephew for the afternoon/evening. And I was sitting there with needles and medical supplies strewn over my kitchen table, chatting with my nurse as people traffic came in and out and I thought, yeah...this is not normal. 

But its us and we're doing it and another January is in the rearview mirror.


Meg A. said...

Oh man I love this. Even more, I love your heart. I love how you talk about the balance of being real and authentic but also not putting your family members' sinful natures on display either. I always sense authenticity in your words on your blog and what you portray. There is never a prideful tone...always humility and I'm always inspired. Keep up the good work, friend!

lily said...

Amen to what Meg said! Lisa, your words speak the truth of what life really is. I so admire your heart and your determination to be real and uplifting at the same time. You are an angel in my life!

Amy said...

YAY, yay, YAY for no chemo / vacuums! I hate BOTH! Love you!!!!! You're pretty incredible!