Friday, July 11, 2008

The Excellent Wife, Ch 16

Communication...Control of the Wife's Tongue

An excellent wife, who can find her? For her worth is far above jewels...She opens her mouth in wisdom, And the teaching of kindness is on her tongue. Proverbs 31:10,26

This chapter presented nine principles regarding the tongue. Personally, God started to deal with me about my words back in chapter 2 when we started talking about sin and just being reminded of the fact that I am a "creature serving the Creator" and my "view of like is to be God-centered, not self-centered."

I hate to admit it, but I often find my thoughts still in the adolescent stage of I know everything and I have handle on the truth so that qualifies me to judge you. What I am slooowly learning is that I do not know everything and I am commanded to not judge anyone. "It is presumption for one person to believe they know what another person is thinking or why they did what they did." When I apply this to my husband, it helps me shut my mouth. Is it possible there is a piece of information I do not have? Would he have thought that through and then hurt me purposely anyway?

I married a Mechanical Engineer and he fits many of the associated stero-types. He thinks everything through and does nothing without a solid reason behind it. I try to remember not to ask his reasons for doing things because I've learned over the years that there always is one and if he shares it with me, it will bring on brain spasms.

Just as an example, sometimes he's looking for a particular pair of socks and if, after a couple minutes of searching we cannot find them, I'll slip up and ask why he needs those socks. Always, he is ready to give me a 20-point-domino thought process of why those socks. Mid-way through, I am begging for mercy. It would be fun to have him on as a guest sometime so you can see for yourself...its truly crazy.

Anyway...I just have to remember to not pass judgement on the "motives of men's hearts" I Corinthians 4:5.

If you read my take on the last chapter then you know I was excited to see the first point this week is:

A Wife's Wrong Words Begin With Wrong Thoughts and Motives

For the mouth speaks out of that which fills the heart. Matthew 12:34

"Heart in Scripture includes a person's thoughts, choices, or motives. Your 'heart' is not some emotional part of you that you have no control over. What you think about is a choice you make." My thoughts, my words, the condition of my heart are My. Choices. Its so important that we are constantly dumping good, edifying stuff into our heart.

From chapter 3:

"How hard you work at putting on the right thoughts and actions will directly affect how much like the Lord Jesus Christ you become in this life."

Hands down, my purpose here on earth is to glorify God. If my life is not about that then why was I put here for this little speck of time? I know it brings glory to Him when I speak kind, loving, healing words to my husband. Now I just need to practice!!


Jackie @ Our Moments Our Memories said...

You have so much wisdom, and I love hearing your thoughts on what you are learning. So true...sometimes I think I feel overly free to "express myself" to my husband without stopping to think about how it might affect him.

You really should have your hubby guest post sometime...that would be fun!

Jackie @ Our Moments Our Memories said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

Hmm, it sounds like your husband and my husband have a lot in common. Mine studied engineering, too, and he definitely has his favorite articles of clothing.

Amy said...

Well spoken!